


When Life Gives Me Lemons, I Make ... Something

by amathela



Category: Wizards of Waverly Place
Genre: F/M, Hijinks & Shenanigans, Humor, Incest, Love Potion/Spell, Magic
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-04-28
Updated: 2013-04-28
Packaged: 2017-12-09 19:20:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,914
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/777087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/amathela/pseuds/amathela
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Max starts a lemonade stand. Alex helps. Obviously, it goes flawlessly and nothing disastrous happens at all.</p>
            </blockquote>





	When Life Gives Me Lemons, I Make ... Something

**Author's Note:**

  * For [aoife_hime](https://archiveofourown.org/users/aoife_hime/gifts).



"Lemonade!" Max shouts. "Get your lemonade!"

Alex glances over at him, which is just about the maximum amount she's prepared to move. Even in the shade, she can feel the sun beating down like it's out to get her personally, sweat plastering her shirt to her skin and her legs, she's pretty sure, to the bench she just sat down on.

Well. It's not like she's planning to get up any time soon, anyway.

All in all, lemonade sounds really, really good right now. Walking across the street to get it, not so much.

"Do you deliver?" she shouts back at Max, who looks like he's considering it.

"It'll cost you."

"I'll give you a dollar and promise not to dump it on your head."

"Deal," says Max, who obviously knows a good thing when he sees it. Not that she could be bothered to raise her hand above her head, but still. "Here you go."

The lemonade is surprisingly good. Considering that it's coming from Max, which means she pretty much expected some combination of water, kitchen utensils, and lemon-scented drain cleaner.

And considering that it's bright green.

"Hey, Max," she says. Carefully, because he's mixing up a new batch, and she doesn't want the entire street to, you know, explode. "Isn't lemonade supposed to be yellow?"

"Yeah," he scoffs. "If I wanted to be like everyone else."

Right. Which raises the question that she really, really shouldn't ask. "So why is it green?"

"Magic," he yells back, at which point a huge group of people walks between them. Obviously. "I mean, haha, not magic! Because magic isn't real. This just has ... snot in it. Lots and lots of snot."

And then they don't even have the decency to send their dirty looks over to Max; instead, they glare at Alex, who's still drinking hers. Awesome.

"Whew," Max says when they're gone. "Nailed it."

"Yeah," she says. "You really dodged a bullet with that one. Now everyone's going to want to come buy one of your snot lemonades."

"Thanks," he says brightly, and then screws up his face in confusion. "Wait, are you being sarcastic?"

"Wow. Nothing gets by you, does it?"

Still. Terrible word of mouth or not, she thinks Max might be onto something here. Take a glass of lemonade, add magic, and -

"I love it," she says. "I'm in."

"In what?"

"In this," she says. "You know. Lemonade. And selling ... lemonade."

"But I'm selling lemonade," Max points out.

"Wow," Alex says. "Yes, you are. Why didn't I notice that?"

She waits; it'll click. Eventually. Probably.

It's not like she was doing anything else, anyway.

"Wait," he says. "What if we sold lemonade together?"

"Good idea, Max," she says. "Why didn't I think of that?"

"But I still get to squeeze the lemons."

As in, the only part of making lemonade that's actually work? Deal.

"So," she says. "About the part where you used magic."

-

A wave of hot air hits Alex when she enters the sub shop, and for a second, she thinks about sending Max into the lair instead. But, well. That way almost certainly lies disaster. And more work for her. 

Besides, what could possibly -

"Alex," Justin says. "Table three needs a refill, table seven wants dessert, and table six still hasn't gotten their meals."

Right. "And this is my problem, how exactly?"

"Because you're supposed to be working today."

"And I am," she says. "Me and Max are selling drinks outside."

"Max and I."

"What? No, you're not."

"That's not what I meant," Justin says. "It's supposed to be Max and I, not - I was correcting your grammar."

"Well, don't," she says. "It's confusing." And the reason he doesn't have any cool friends.

"So is dad asking you to sell drinks outside when we can get more customers by making them come in here."

"Yeah, well," she says, shrugging. "For no particular reason, where is dad?"

"He and mom went to the movies, Justin says. "He said it was cheaper to spend ten bucks on a movie ticket than two hundred to get air conditioning installed."

While leaving the three of them to swelter back at home. That's just great.

Actually, no, that's really great.

"Too bad," she says. "I would have told you to ask him yourself, but I guess you can't."

"Alex -"

"If you don't believe me, you can come see the stall," she says. "It's right outside. In fact, I was just coming in to get some more ice." And to sneak into the lair, but it's not like she has to tell him _everything_.

"I will," he says, and Alex tries not to smile; she loves it when Justin not trusting her works in her favour.

"You do that," she says. "But if you want one, you have to pay."

"But dad -"

"Was the one who made up that rule."

And Justin can't even argue with that, because, rules. She will literally never get that about him. But right now, it means he's left her a way to get to the lair without him noticing, so she's fine with it.

So, now she just has to get the rest of the potions Max 'borrowed'. He wasn't super clear on where he got them from, because, well, he's Max, and it's not like Alex pays enough attention in class to know where the potions are kept, but, hey. She figures she's got at least a couple of minutes, and it can't be that hard, can it? Bright rainbow potions don't exactly lend themselves well to camouflage, after all.

Anyway, she knows her dad pretty well, and if he were trying to hide something, he'd probably put it -

In the cupboard he really thinks she believes he keeps their old school reports in (like she hasn't seen him throwing them away, not that she blames him), third drawer from the bottom. Perfect.

She's finished and back out of the lair just as Justin comes back in, and she quickly grabs a glass, dropping it off at one of the tables on her way to the door. "You're welcome for covering your shift while you were taking a break, by the way," she tells Justin, then leaves before he can argue.

So, this might actually work.

And when she gets outside, Max hasn't even blown anything up, so that's Alex: 2, Universe: 0. Suck on that.

"I figured out a way to make lemonade even faster," Max tells her proudly as she approaches. "See, when I was squeezing the lemons, I kept thinking, why am I throwing most of this out? And then it hit me: just use the whole lemon."

Alex glances down, and sure enough, there's a bunch of lemons floating in water on the table.

"Max, that's -" she starts, and sighs. They're already using magic, right? So she can totally fix this. (She hopes so, anyway. The last thing she wants to do right now is start squeezing lemons like she was telling Justin the truth and she's actually working out here, even if she is feeling weirdly motivated. Besides, if it doesn't stop getting hotter out here, she thinks soon they'll probably be able to sell liquid Alex.) "Whatever. Keep selling the green stuff, I'm going to whip us up a new batch."

Somehow. It's not exactly like the potions came with an instruction manual, but hey, it's not like she'd read one of those anyway. Besides, if Max could figure this out, Alex is certain she can, too.

So ... maybe if she just, like. Dumps the potion into the lemonade? (Or floating lemon water, whatever.) It seems like something Max would do, anyway.

So. Here goes nothing.

She starts with the orange potion, and the water - well, she's pretty sure it does something, anyway, kind of shimmering in the way successful magic usually does. (So, like she sees Justin's do.) What it doesn't do is turn a bunch of floating lemons into lemonade.

Quickly glancing around to make sure nobody's watching, Alex pulls her wand out and mutters, "floating lemons that Max made, please turn them into lemonade."

Alex: 4, Universe: 0. This is only, like, the best day ever.

So, okay, maybe she ignores the really weird way her first customer seems totally normal seems really normal when she sells them a cup of orange lemonade, and then comes back and demands _all_ of it. Like, sure, it's hot out, Alex gets it, but no way it's hot enough to justify spending sixty bucks on a bowl full of lemonade (that doesn't even have any ice in it, because she totally forgot to put some in, whatever).

Or the way her second customer gets super mad at her after she sells him some red lemonade, like, what, he was fine waiting fifteen minutes while she magicked up a new batch but all of a sudden he can't wait the three seconds it takes her to hand him a napkin? Jerk.

So maybe it's more like Alex: 4, Universe: 2. But she's still winning, by, like ... a lot of points.

And it's not like she's some world's greatest detective or whatever, so it's doesn't exactly occur to her to connect her and Max's magical lemonade to their customers acting totally whacked. Which is why she doesn't hesitate to offer some to Harper when she spots her friend.

(Besides, Alex had some of the green lemonade earlier, and she's totally fine, right?)

"Wow," Harper says, once she's managed to push her way to the front. A few of the people still waiting in line don't look super happy about it, but whatever, she just won't give them any of the red lemonade. "Alex, this is ... are you actually doing work?"

"I know, right?" Alex says. Whatever, she's been feeling weirdly motivated ever since - well, ever since Max gave her that lemonade, actually. "And the best part is, I actually get to keep the money instead of it all going to dad's stupid 'cash register'."

"Um," Harper says. "A cash register is a real thing. I don't think you need the air quotes."

Yeah, whatever. It's a rip off, either way.

"So," she says. "What colour do you want? We've got everything except orange."

"I'll just have yellow," Harper says, sounding doubtful.

"Seriously?" Alex asks. "Yellow lemonade is for people too scared to try anything else."

"Yep," Harper says. "Yellow it is."

"Fine," Alex says, and pours Harper a cup. "That'll be five dollars."

"Seriously?"

Ugh, fine, she can have it for free. But Harper seriously owes her one; it's not like lemonade grows on trees, you know.

"Wait," Harper says, after taking a sip. "What did you say was in this, again?"

Alex shrugs. "Water. Sugar." Magic potions.

"So it's not, like ... dangerous?"

"Harper, what is with you? It's fine."

"Right," Harper says. "Right. I'm sure you're right. It's just - aah, Justin!"

Which is when Harper full on screams and jumps back, like, ten feet, spilling her drink all over herself in the process.

"Justin," she says, at a normal volume this time. "You scared me."

"Yeah," Alex deadpans. "His face has that effect on me all the time."

"Funny," Justin says. "Anyway, it's time for my regularly scheduled five minute break, so I thought I'd come out here and try some of that lemonade. You know, it's interesting, after I had some this morning, I've gotten so much done."

"Yeah," Alex says, "that's not interesting. Anyway, we're out of green."

"And blue," Max says. "And purple. And red, and yellow, and orange."

"So," Alex says, "were out of lemonade?"

"Nope," Max says. "We've still got pink. I wouldn't sell it anyone."

"Why not?" she asks.

He looks at her like it's a stupid question, and says, "Because it's pink. Duh."

Right. Of course. What was she thinking?

"All right," she says. "We've got pink."

"I'll have pink, then," Justin says.

"Perfect," Alex says, and pours one for herself, too.

It isn't the first stupid thing she's done today. But it might be the most stupid.

-

Alex jumps when somebody grabs her wrist, shuffling to keep up as she's dragged into the lair. By the time she's fully worked out what's going on, she's sitting side by side with Justin on the couch, her knees pressed against his, his grip still firm on her arm.

And - is it just her, or is it still really hot in here?

"Alex," he says. "What was in that lemonade?"

"What?" she asks. How could he possibly -

Except then he looks at her, with that Alex-I-Know-you-did-something-wrong-so-just-fess-up-to-it look he's so good at, and she sighs.

"It was Max's idea," she says, because no way is she getting in trouble for this alone.

"What was Max's idea?"

"Um," she says. "Using magic?"

And she expects Justin to get mad about that, because, well, he's Justin, and she used magic without permission, and he kind of lives for telling her 'I told you so'. Instead, she could swear he looks a little relieved.

Yeah, that can't be right.

"Fine," she says. "How much trouble am I in?"

"A lot," Justin says. "Alex -"

"Look, I'll give the money back if that's what you're -"

"- I think something was in those drinks."

"Yeah," she says. "Potions, duh."

His eyes narrow at that, and his grip on her wrist tightens. "What potions?"

Ugh, like she keeps track of all the magic she does that she's not supposed to? But, wait, she knows where she got them from, maybe there's -

"These," she says, handing Justin the card that she digs out of the drawer. His hand brushes hers as she does, and she could swear there's some kind of static in the air that wasn't there before. Too much magic, probably; their mom keeps telling their dad he should have a proper ventilation system put in, but this is the guy who won't even spring for air conditioning in the middle of summer, so.

"Alex," Justin says, scanning the card. He grabs her hand, and this time, she nearly jumps. "These are emotional spectrum potions."

"Emotional what now? Is that like those potions you and dad drank that made you really mad at each other?"

"Sort of," Justin says. He looks worried, which doesn't really mean much; Justin looked worried the last time the weather lady said there was a chance of a late shower. "Those were emotion potions. These are ... stronger."

"Okay, so, they're stronger," she says. "So?"

"So," he says, "you just used all seven of them."

"And?"

"And that's really bad," he says. "Look at this! Rage. Avarice."

"Yeah, I don't know what that -"

"It means greed," he says. "Fear."

Fear. "Let me guess," she says. "Fear is yellow?"

"Yeah," he says. "How did you know?"

Because she gave yellow to Harper, who started getting all paranoid and nearly jumped out of her skin when Justin talked to her. Although, Alex has to admit, maybe her paranoia about what was in the lemonade wasn't entirely unfounded.

"Lucky guess?" she tries.

"Alex -"

"All right," she says. "So we sold some bad lemonade. But look at these other ones - hope, compassion." Willpower. Green. No wonder she was feeling so motivated all day. She should have known that wasn't natural. "Those are good, right?"

"Those aren't the ones I'm worried about," he says. "Alex, you sold out of all of these."

Which means there are a lot of very angry, very scared people wandering around New York right now. Great.

"Well," she says. "If it helps, I only sold orange to that one guy."

"Of course you did," he says. "But we still need to fix this."

He looks serious as he says that, which Alex can tell, because suddenly he's standing really, really close to her. Is it suddenly? She can't even remember where he was standing before. And why is it still so damn hot in here?

"How?" she asks. And she should be stepping back now. Right. Taking a step back. Is what she should do. Because of the heat. And the weirdness.

"We ... I don't know," he says. "But we have to do something. We can't just leave all that magic running loose through the city."

"Ugh," she says. "Fine. But this had better not take long."

Because she's pretty sure the green potion has worn off already, which is just perfect timing. Though it does remind her -

"By the way," she says. "What was in the pink one?"

And, yeah, he was a little flushed already, but she could swear Justin blushes even more when he says, "Love."

So, ignoring that.

"All right," she says, once they're outside. "So where do we start?"

Her question answers itself almost immediately.

"How about we head towards the screams?" Justin suggests, and she nods.

(She doesn't know when they started holding hands, either, but - she's ignoring a lot of things right now, okay? One more is no big deal.)

Somebody screams again, and - damn it, Alex knows that scream. "That's Harper," she says, and maybe the green potion hasn't worn off entirely, because she starts to run.

When they get there, though (still holding hands, and seriously, what is up with that? No, wait, don't answer that), Harper's the only one there.

"The man!" Harper says, sounding hysterical. "He's after us."

"Harper," Alex says, trying to sound soothing. "There's nobody there. It's okay."

"Actually," justin says, and tugs her around.

Okay, so, there's somebody there.

A man.

A very angry man.

"So," she says. "Another one of ours?"

Justin turns to her, as if to say, _ours?_ , but when he does, there's a very different look in his eyes instead. Which, okay, ignoring.

"So how do we fix it?" she asks.

Which is when the problem fixes itself. Kind of.

At first, Alex is pretty sure the guy's crazy. But then she looks down at the cup in his hand, still with a tiny bit of blue liquid in the bottom, and she realises he's just enchanted.

Which is her fault. Again.

Except instead of getting himself smashed to pieces or whatever, he seems to ... calm the angry guy down? So, that was unexpected.

"All will be well," blue lemonade guy says. And Alex even kind of believes it.

And then she looks down at where she and Justin are still holding hands, and, well. Maybe not.

"So," she says. "That -"

And then the red lemonade guy seems to snap out of whatever was calming him down again, and she pretty much just runs.

With Justin. Who's still holding her hand. Kind of awkwardly, too, since he pulled her into something she's pretty sure was supposed to be a hiding spot but is really more of a crack in the wall, barely big enough for two people and only if one of his legs is sandwiched, um, in between hers, and did she mention it's still really hot out here?

"Alex," he says, and she rolls her eyes.

"Justin she says. "Look, I know it's all my fault, okay? I just don't know what you want me to do about it if -"

And then he's -

Well.

Kissing her.

And Alex has managed to ignore a lot of ... interesting stuff today, but this is a bit too much even for her amazing powers of 'pretending stuff I don't like isn't happening'.

Besides, well. Who's to say she doesn't like it?

Which is. Um.

Bad?

Or maybe good, especially when he runs his free hand over her neck, when his knee presses up a little higher and he backs her into the stone, pressing closer, and that probably has to be at least partly the potion, because no way is Justin actually that good at this.

"Oh, god," he says, and at first, it sends a shiver all the way down her, until she realises he's not talking about this.

And, yep, that's another scream.

"Angry guy?" she asks. Only a little breathlessly, which is good enough.

"Angry guy," Justin says. And then looks back at her, and -

Well, maybe it's enough to say that this time, her not wanting to chase a bunch of enchanted people around the city has nothing to do with being lazy.

"Angry guy," she says again, mostly to herself, but Justin nods.

"Right. We have to deal with him first."

(And, first? That definitely beings up a lot of interesting possibilities.)

-

All told, their schedule for the next couple of hours looks something like this:

Follow screams to where angry guy is terrorising tourists.

Try to convince Justin to let him scare tourists just a little longer. Fail.

Justin casts spell from near-encyclopedic knowledge of magic on angry guy, calms angry guy down. Celebratory makeouts.

Follow more screams to where Harper is now being terrorised by a shrub. Consider leaving her. Ask Justin to cast second spell. DO NOT MAKE OUT.

Chase down two more angry people, four terrified people, and one really greedy guy now attempting (unsuccessfully) to rob an ATM. 

Make out. A lot.

By that last stage, Alex is pretty sure the potion has worn off; it's been a while since they've come across anyone else obviously under the influence of magical lemonade, but at some stage, it's just more awkward to suddenly stop making out with your brother than it is to just keep doing it. Or something.

All Alex knows is that the fever in the air finally broke, and she feels pretty damn good.

At least, until they get home.

-

"So," their dad says, almost before they're completely through the door. Not holding hands, because Alex doesn't feel strangely compelled to do that any more, and because that would look really weird. "Lemonade stand?"

Well, that lasted all of a few hours. Still, at this point it's basically like Alex: 4, Universe: A Billion, so she hands over her share of the money without complaining. (Too hard.)

"I am proud of you, though" he says. "This is more money than we made at the sub shop all day. Good work, Alex."

She instinctively glances at Justin, because that's when he usually comes in with a well-timed confession about how she didn't work hard at all, she just used magic, but -

Well, maybe there are benefits to the whole making out thing beyond the obvious, because he still looks a little stunned. In any case, he lets it slide.

"Thanks," she says. "So, What's for dinner?"

"Macaroni salad," their mom says, which Alex knows is just code for 'macaroni and cheese, but healthier sounding'. "And lemonade."

Alex grimaces, and carefully doesn't look at Justin. "Actually," she says, "I think I'll just have water."

-

"And in local news, Waverly Place and surrounding areas were hit with a heat wave - and alongside it, a wave of extremely erratic behaviour. One citizen was caught tearing down -"

Alex quickly lunges for the remote and switches over to another channel. "Wow," she says. "That was really boring news, huh?"

"Alex," Justin says. He tries to swipe the remote, which she holds up out of his reach; he was always terrible at this game. "You know I like to watch the weather."

"You like to watch the weather girl," she says, but actually, that gives her a great idea. Looking around quickly to make sure nobody's watching them, she leans in, and whispers, "What if I made it up to you?"

Yep, there are _definitely_ benefits to the whole making out thing. Which, right now, she's going to explore.

**Author's Note:**

> Emotional spectrum shamelessly stolen from Green Lantern. In case it didn't come across, it goes like:
> 
> red = rage  
> orange = avarice  
> yellow = fear  
> green = will  
> blue = hope  
> indigo = compassion  
> violet = love


End file.
